Seriously, I did say these things.

Strangest things I’ve had to say as a parent:
-“That’s not your tooth; it’s a little rock you found in the drive way.”
-“Stop licking your shoes.”
-“So…..why is the cat covered in toothpaste?”
-“No, I don’t think it is a good idea to rip the legs off.”
-“Cheese graters DO NOT belong in the toilet!”
Strangest things I’ve had to say as a Vet Tech:
-“Explain to me again how…..you……ran over your dog’s head with a tractor.”
-“Why is this cat covered in baby oil?”
-“Amputating the leg might not be advised at this time.”
-“Right now, I think we should focus more on (long term prognosis) than whether or not your cat will have a satisfying sex life.”
-“Just put the dog in the freezer until Jack can bring the chain saw by.”

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